Often when working at my computer, both at home and at work, I listen to classical guitar music on Pandora. Because it is Pandora, I don’t have much control of what musical pieces I will hear, but I do know they will all involve the guitar. However, there is one song that always compels me to stop working and to listen deeply with both my ears and my spirit. The song is simple, short, sweet and gorgeous, and it takes my breath away musically. But my spirit aches each time I hear it, and its simplistic beauty will often lead me to unexplained and unexpected tears.
This lovely song is Cavatina, written by British composer, Stanley Myers, in 1970. It was originally composed to be played on piano and for the movie, “The Walking Stick.” However, classical guitarist John Williams recorded Cavatina on guitar. Williams’ performance of Cavatina became famous as the theme song of the 1978 movie, “The Deer Hunter.”
I remember seeing “The Deer Hunter.” It was a shocking (for the time) movie about soldiers in Vietnam. In particular, it featured Robert de Niro and Christopher Walken as prisoners of war being forced to play Russian roulette. The movie shows in exquisite detail the horrors of the Vietnam War and the after-effect on the soldiers’ lives.
The reason I always stop and listen with my spirit to this song is because I can never really comprehend how such a sweet and beautiful song will forever be associated with such a horrific movie and troubled time in history. Next to each other, they seem to form a jarring relationship.
Today was a hard day at work. The grief was palpable as I and others on my hospice team faced loss once again. I am just one among many people experiencing all types of loss and grief these days.
But is it possible that something good will rise up from the ashes of our present losses and make something smarter, something better, even something beautiful? Is it possible that we could end up wiser from all the pain, loss and grief from which we now suffer?
I think I will always struggle with this, but perhaps there is a lesson in here for me as person, for me as chaplain, and for those I serve as chaplain. Even in the most difficult, painful, frightening, and life-altering times, there may be a thing of simple beauty. Maybe that thing is God. Maybe for me it is the humbling privilege of being the one to bear God to people in these times. Maybe it is the reconciliation that families experience when life itself becomes focused on the precious life of a loved one. Maybe it is the beauty of a wandering soul returning to his or her beloved creator/parent. Maybe it is realizing what is most important when other things have been stripped away. Maybe it is the opportunity to rely solely on God when all human and heroic efforts fail. But I do know one thing; this uncomfortable juxtaposition is a true reflection of life. So, I will continue to listen…..
In case you would like to hear this song, here is the YouTube address: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c6gpa8nUa70